As parents, we all want our children to thrive at school. However, it’s becoming increasingly common for students to face challenges that impact their education and well-being. If you’ve noticed your child struggling with school, you’re not alone.
A February 2024 survey by the youth mental health charity stem4 found that nearly 30% of UK secondary school students have missed school due to anxiety in the past year, with 48% reporting mental health distress such as anxiety, depression, or eating disorders.
This rise in emotionally based school avoidance (EBSA) has contributed to a 70% increase in GCSE-year student absences compared to pre-pandemic levels. The reasons behind these struggles are varied and complex, ranging from academic pressure to social issues and mental health concerns.
In this blog, I’ll explore the signs that your child might be struggling at school, understand the potential reasons behind these difficulties, and offer practical advice on how you can support them through this challenging time.
What are some common signs a child is struggling at school?
Recognising when your child is having difficulties at school is the first step towards providing the support they need. Here are some key signs to watch out for:
- They get upset when you mention school: While mood swings are normal for teens, a noticeable change in their attitude towards school could indicate difficulty. They may be frustrated due to learning gaps, struggling with homework, or experiencing a dip in confidence.
- They spend too much time on homework: While more time on homework can be expected as school levels increase, excessive hours on the same topic may signal they need extra help. Hunched posture and a deflated mood while studying suggest they’re struggling and could benefit from support.
- Their sleep and eating habits have changed: Trouble at school may affect a child’s mental and physical health, leading to sleep disturbances or appetite changes. Signs include frequent tiredness, irritability, skipping meals, overeating, or excessive junk food consumption.
- They lose interest in hobbies: If they no longer engage in activities they used to love, it may be a sign of school-related stress or anxiety.
- They spend more time alone: A shift towards isolation, avoiding socialising with friends, and spending excessive hours staring at screens or lying in bed can indicate deeper struggles.
- They are avoiding school or attendance is falling: Reluctance to go to school or a pattern of absences can be a clear sign of school-related difficulties.
- You have received concerns from their teachers: If teachers have reached out about your child’s performance, behaviour, or engagement, it’s important to take these concerns seriously.
Remember, every child is different, and these signs may manifest in various ways. If you notice a combination of these behaviours or a significant change in your child’s demeanour, it might be time to dig deeper and seek support.
What causes school struggles?
Understanding the root causes of your child’s difficulties can help you provide more targeted support.
Here are some common reasons why children might struggle at school:
- Lessons/school itself: Some children find it challenging to adapt to the school environment. They might be worried about making friends or fitting in, find schoolwork or lessons confusing, feel pressured to learn in a certain way, or find their relationships with teachers difficult.
- External factors: Sometimes, going through difficult experiences outside of school can make it harder for a child to feel settled at school. This could include bereavement, an illness in the family, or being a young carer.
- Health: For some young people, the school environment isn’t right for them, and trying to fit into it can create a huge amount of stress. This might be the case if they are struggling with their mental health, or have a neurodiverse condition or Special Educational Need (SEN) such as autism, ADHD, dyslexia or dyspraxia. This can make the school environment anxiety-provoking and exhausting, especially if their condition or need is undiagnosed or not being well supported.
- Increased academic pressure: The jump from Year 9 to GCSEs (Year 10-11) can be overwhelming, with controlled assessments, coursework, and mock exams accumulating.
- Exam pressure: The weight of GCSEs and predicted grades for sixth form, college, or apprenticeships can cause significant stress.
- Bullying or social problems: Friendship issues, bullying, or exclusion at school can affect their well-being and concentration in lessons.
- Mental health struggles: Anxiety and depression often escalate during GCSE years, especially if students feel they are failing to meet expectations.
- Social media and distractions: Overuse of TikTok, gaming, and smartphones can prevent focus on studies and revision.
By identifying which of these factors might be affecting your child, you can better tailor your approach to supporting them and seek appropriate help from school or other professionals.
Some practical ways to support a child who is struggling at school
Once you’ve identified that your child is having difficulties, there are several steps you can take to support them:
At home:
- Keep communication open: Encourage your child to talk about their struggles without fear of judgment.
- Help with organisation: Use planners, to-do lists, or revision timetables to manage homework, coursework, and exam prep.
- Create a structured study routine: Provide a quiet, screen-free study space and encourage effective revision techniques like flashcards and past papers.
- Support good well-being habits: Ensure they’re getting enough sleep, taking breaks from screens, and managing stress.
Working with the school:
- Speak to their tutor or Head of Year: Teachers can offer extra support, intervention sessions, or adjustments for learning needs.
- Use school-provided resources: Many schools offer revision classes, homework help, or subject-specific online platforms.
- Ask about SEN support: If your child has undiagnosed difficulties, speak to the SENCO about assessments or tailored support.
- Monitor school communications: Keep an eye on attendance, behaviour, and progress via school apps like SIMS or ClassCharts.
Considering alternative learning options:
- Explore online or flexible learning: Some students thrive in virtual, hybrid, or home education settings, which offer structured curriculums with greater flexibility. Speak to the school or local authority to understand available options.
- Look into tutoring: Private or online tutors can help build confidence in subjects they’re struggling with.
Further options:
- Access mental health resources: School counsellors, GP referrals to the Child and Adolescent Mental Health Service (CAMHS), or youth mental health charities can provide support.
- Encourage alternative pathways: If traditional GCSE learning isn’t suitable, explore vocational courses, apprenticeships, or alternative post-16 routes.
Remember, supporting a struggling child often requires a multi-faceted approach. Be patient, stay involved, and don’t hesitate to seek professional help when needed.
You’re not alone
Supporting a child who is struggling at school can be challenging, but remember that you’re not alone in this journey.
By recognising the signs early, understanding the potential reasons behind their difficulties, and taking proactive steps to support them, you can make a significant difference in your child’s educational experience and overall well-being.
Every child’s situation is unique, so remain flexible and open to different approaches. Whether it’s working closely with their current school, exploring alternative learning options, or seeking additional support, the key is to find a solution that best fits your child’s needs.
If you’re considering online schooling, private tutoring, or tutoring via your child’s school, we at TLC LIVE are here to help. Our personalised approach and flexible learning options could be the change your child needs to thrive academically and emotionally.
Contact us today to discuss how we can support your child’s educational journey and help them reach their full potential.
By Ryan Lockett, Headteacher, TLC LIVE Online School